Its been almost 13 years since I have experienced a true fall. The kind where leaves change and fall,rain lasts all day, sun shines on frosty fields and wood smoke is the most common smell on the air. Its lovely and Ive missed it. I have been on the road alot the last few months, KY, VA and such. So I have seen some pretty vistas. Ive also missed a plethora of wonderful festivals around these here parts. Oktoberfest came and went with out so much as a swallow of dopple bock for me. There was a pottery festival, many a fall farmers market, several town specific parades and celebrations and at least one organized trail ride that I missed or otherwise couldn't attend. Bummer! I was determined to do at least one though and so I set my sights on "A Southern Christmas" A downtown , Charlotte staple. True I was giving up small town quaint for big city glitz but what the hey right? It was a festival for the holidays and I was not going to miss one more! We found the exit in part due to the line of cars stopping traffic on the highway. "uh oh, this IS a pretty big deal" Tim said as we added to the obstruction, nosing our car onto the shoulder behind about 100 others. Turns out this wasn't the first of the lines we encountered that day. There was the line to buy tickets, the line to get in, the line to get through the entire Christmas village set up inside the expo center, the line to the bathrooms( of course) the line for the wine tasting, luckily we abhor sweet wines the staple here in the great grape growing region of the triad. So our favored wines had no waiting! grin, But we did have to wait to get close enough to signal the down trodden Shiraz seller to fill us up several samples of his finest! He was so happy to see us, poor soul. Oh, then of course there where the lines and traffic snarls caused by every stroller in a hundred mile radius being used to haul loot and the occasional screeching child. Can I just say, that in such tight quarters there should be a stroller lane, where moms and shoppers with a need to stroll their loot around can congregate and chat and otherwise stay out of the flow of real traffic trying to just enjoy the sights elbow to elbow with thousands of our closest friends. After completing what Tim and I assumed was the whole show, we headed for the potty and that's where I found to my surprise that there was two more buildings full of show! OMG....Tim paled a little when I told him about it but we gamely pushed on. Through the hall of fried food, past the lonely salad and pita wrap sellers and into a flea market nightmare. There where taffy vendors( who really eats this stuff?), knife sellers, people hawking shammy's, hose nozzles,essential oils and nonstick cookware. All of them had microphones and flashy booths with demos at high volume and to ad to the painfully slow traffic, free samples. It was quite the thing let me tell you! We emerged from the first of the two buildings ready to cut out on the third but where lured in by some live Christmas trees and Santa figurines. After they had you locked into the flow of traffic it became the same flea market horror as the other. So with one brief stop at the Christmas village, for a holiday like cleanse, we took our leave and headed out to find lunch. Big city, Saturday, good restaurants...right? eh, yeah good CLOSED restaurants only open for dinner or closed at 1pm to reopen at 5pm....it was 2pm.
We managed to find a grill of some sort open near the fresh market (where I was determined to eat if yet one more food joint was closed to us.) It was food at least and rather a pleasantly dim place after the bright, loud show! But the best was on the way home. Tim spots a Gun show sign and with a classic,mischievious grin, wheels on in to peruse firearms. I enjoyed the firearm owners and attendees myself. A den of eclectic fanatics you have never seen. And the odors! Musty world war two era jackets, duffel bags and gun cases, deer pee, motor oil and cigarettes. Shew! as they say here in the south! Not to mention the occasional beer fumes and fried onions smell emitting from my fellow shoppers. Now , I'm not a gun loving sort, but on a purely aesthetic plane, I found I fancied hammer less, 38 revolvers with a laser in the grip, in shiny gun metal, silver! But that's just me.....Tim liked big, black guns with clips. Now everyone who has watched any amount of detective/police/mystery-kill-kill TV knows that clips can jam and do at the most inopportune times! And like the westerns I always have favored, there is something heart stopping about the sun glinting off of a barrel of a gun! That being said, for actual protection should one need it, I think a flame thrower would be most effective, collateral damage be damned. If someone is on fire their focus will likely shift from you to themselves. There where no flame throwers there though, *sigh* only "girl-ey" weapons like mace and tasers....oh and guns of course! So our get into the spirit weekend was eclectic to be sure, but in some ways so appropriate. We hit the wives to do first, and the place where alot of the husbands where second. A very telling and authentic southern fall outing I'd say!
